Man Finds Himself In The Friend Zone After Picking Up Date In Mazda 3

Joseph Tan has been relegated to the friend zone after failing to impress his long-term crush Stella Wong. The Insta hotty with a respectable following (5k) was not impressed with the date that Joseph had spent days planning.

“As soon as I saw him pull up in the driveway, my stomach started to twist,” she recalls. “I tried to be optimistic but his taste in cars was as basic as his choice in the restaurant – Criniti’s.”

Stella goes on to describe her date’s ‘safe’ choices and claims he provides no exciting prospects as a future partner.

“He drove the speed limit the whole way and would stop at every yellow. Where’s the excitement in that?” She asked.

“My ex used to drive a GTR and deal pills. This guy works at Deloitte and drives a Mazda 3. That car is the physical embodiment of ‘I only do missionary and I love John Legend.’ Snooze!”

More spice to come

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Goannadeep is senior journalist at The YAP Native. After completing an Arts degree, he succumbed to the pressure of his parents and is making steady progress towards the Charted Accountant accreditation.